Bloody Email Exchanges

Listening to: Dido – No Angel

Mood: Mischievous

Sometimes my writer’s mind spills over into my day job. Take the following Monday-morning email exchange from this week for example:

Coworker: I need to leave a little early today to pick up my car at the Honda dealership. Lucky me, I got an irreparable flat tire yesterday and had to buy new ones.

Me: Nope, not allowed. Sorry. You must stay chained to your desk. The soul-sucking Monday god demands it.

Coworker: Suck it.

Me: It’s not ME saying this. It’s the soul-sucking Monday god. I hate that asshole.

Coworker: Fucking Mondays.

Me: I want to throw Monday out the window and watch it plunge seven stories to its bloody and gruesome death. And then I want a bus to roll over it and smear it into the pavement. THAT is how much I hate Mondays.

Coworker: That’s a lot of rage. I just want to go back to sleep and pretend Monday isn’t a real day. I’m lazy.

Me: That’s very passive of you, but I dig it.

Coworker: I think our different approaches to Mondays say a lot about us.

If I’m this vicious about a day of the week, you can imagine what I put my characters through. *evil writer laugh*